


What Sherlock Needed

by thelookyouredoingthelookagain



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Comfort, Cuddling, Fluff, Friendship, Love, M/M, Series 1-ish, Sherlock's Dream, Sherlock's Need
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-01-17
Packaged: 2018-03-07 21:12:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3183347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelookyouredoingthelookagain/pseuds/thelookyouredoingthelookagain
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John's arrival in the flat changes Sherlock in many ways, but a new need alarms him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Sherlock Needed

**Author's Note:**

> All works here were produced by two friends in the fandom. One writes as SH and one as John, and we edit together. Our characters are based on the BBC's _Sherlock_ , though we don't mind playing a little loosely with canon and the occasional AU. We have whims and like to follow them. While we like to torture our boys with constant misunderstandings, we know they belong together and we always see to that.
> 
> All posted works are complete, and we hope there will be something for everyone. Please take a look at our other works. Just a note, though, there's pretty much always going to be smut. Sometimes fluff, sometimes angst, but always smut. We can't help it: that's just the way we are.
> 
> We plan to add new work each weekend, so please subscribe.
> 
> We also really appreciate the kudos and comments --they mean so much.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

_There's something upsetting on the television, John. I think you should come home immediately. SH_

_If you're scared just turn the telly off, Sherlock. -JW_

_I am not scared, John. I am bored. I have been watching Eastenders and it's upsetting. This is not healthy. I need you. SH_

_I'm leaving soon. -JW_

_Leave now. I am less bored when you are home. It feels almost painful without you. It's most alarming. But slightly intriguing as alarming things often are. SH_

_Are_ _you all right? -JW_

_I'm not quite sure. I think I might be missing you which seems strange since we just saw each other this morning. But I'm quite unsettled. SH_

_You miss me? Well, I'm on my way home now, okay? -JW_

_During my nap I dreamt. SH_

_About what? -JW_

_About the flat. About you. Nothing particularly upsetting in the dream. But once I woke, there was this urgent feeling of needing you to be here. Alarming. SH_

_What was I doing in the dream? -JW_

_Smiling. SH_

_That's it? -JW_

_Smiling at me. SH_

_I do that all the time. -JW_

_I have noted that. When I woke up, I wanted to see it. For real. SH_

John smiled when he read the last message and paid the driver. He rushed up the stairs to the flat. "Sherlock?" he called out as he hung his jacket by the door.

Hearing John's voice -- rather than reading his words -- immediately sent a rush of relief through Sherlock's body. He wanted to rush to John as if he had just returned from a long trip, which surprised him, so instead he set his phone down and glanced up to see John smiling.

"Are you okay?" John asked, joining him on the sofa.

Sherlock realised that he too was smiling, which in and of itself probably appeared alarming. He tried to put on his usual face, but found he couldn't: he simply needed to smile at John. "I do feel a bit better, thank you. I probably shouldn't have disturbed you. It just felt. . . so urgent," he admittedly quietly.

"That's okay," John assured him. "I'm glad I could help."

Sherlock wanted to touch John, though he knew he had no reason to. It was almost as if to double check that it was John, that he was here smiling like he had been in Sherlock's dream. He could not bring himself to do it, though; the best he could do was gently place his hand on the sofa, next to John's leg. It was at least a little closer to him.

John glanced down at Sherlock's hand. Did he want John to take it? That seemed a bit odd but he seemed to be having some sort of crisis and if that's what he needed . . . John internally shrugged it off. He just wanted to help his friend. He reached down and gently covered Sherlock's hand with his own.

"Thank you," Sherlock said quietly. "I seemed to be needing something this evening. I didn't know what it was, but I was sure you could provide it."

"Just let me know what I can do," John said softly.

Having already blushed after that confession, Sherlock decided to no longer censor. "I would like to feel smaller," he said though even he did not know exactly what that meant. "Perhaps I could rest my head in your lap and you could stroke my hair for a few minutes?"

John nodded. "Okay," he said.

"Thank you," Sherlock said again. He snuggled down of the sofa and rested himself in John's lap. He felt John's fingers in his hair. It felt safe and soft and Sherlock's mind started to ease. Yet his body felt a mix of reactions. He felt like he was sinking but at the same time floating. He felt sleepy but also stirrings of something awakening.

John ran his fingers through Sherlock's hair, looking down at him and smiling softly. This was unusual, but not bad.

Sherlock slipped one of his arms under John's thigh, adjusting it as if it were a pillow. "This feels nice," Sherlock said quietly. "Is it all right with you?"

John squirmed a bit until Sherlock fixed himself. "Yes, this is nice," John agreed.

"Did you have a good day at work?" Sherlock asked, realising this may have been the first time he had ever uttered those words to John.

"Uh . . . yeah," John nodded. "It was busy."

"Are you going to get in trouble because of me?" Sherlock felt a slight pang of guilt for demanding that John come home early. Yet, John's hands in his hair felt so right, he couldn't help being glad he had.

"No," John smiled. "They know I can disappear for days on cases . . . coming home an hour won't matter."

"I'm sorry I do cause you trouble. It's not my intention but I know it can be a byproduct. Thank you for tolerating it . . . me," Sherlock's eyes were closed as he said this but he wasn't asleep. He felt like he was somewhere between a dream and reality. This had the comfort of the dream, the safety, but, unlike in the dream, he knew to appreciate it, to savour every moment because it was good and it was real.

"You don't cause me trouble," John said quietly. He slowed his hand as he pet Sherlock.

Sherlock felt warm; he felt nice. Sherlock didn't often feel nice. He felt fine or bored or distracted or focused. But this was just nice. It felt like John was looking after him and though he couldn't bring himself to say it, that feeling seemed to be what he needed. So instead he just thanked John again. As if he wanted to be entirely sure John understood how grateful he was.

John always had to sneakily help Sherlock, tricking him into eating, trying to distract him when he was bored, but this . . . well, this direct help was really nice. Sherlock had asked and John had answered, and it wasn't as strange as he'd thought it would be.

"John," Sherlock said softly. "You know, you can always ask me if you need help. I'm not sure what I have to offer, but I will always provide for you if I can. You're better at these kinds of things . . ." he said, not quite sure what the phrase really meant, "but if you need something, ask me and I promise I will try."

John stilled his hand a moment as heat flooded through him. Happiness. He smiled and moved his hand again. "Sherlock, I know that," he said quietly. "You're amazing."

Sherlock could feel his face go flush again. John had called him amazing before but it had always been about cases, because, let's face it, Sherlock was quite amazing at those things, so John's compliments usually just made him feel even more smug. But this time, the way John said it, something seemed different and it made Sherlock feel almost flustered. Finally, he said, "It's because of you. Your being here makes me . . . " He couldn't find the precise word so he went with "better."

John smiled wider. "Me too," he said. "I mean, you make me better," he added. 

This surprised Sherlock. He knew he worried John, he knew he bossed John, and on occasion he even annoyed John. But he hadn't thought he had thought he'd ever helped John. "I'm not convinced," he said, "but I like the idea." Sherlock slid his free hand down John's leg and wrapped it around his calf. Not gripping it really, just holding on, holding on to John.

"You cured my leg, gave me something to keep living for, a place to live, a friend," John took a deep breath. "You saved me," he added softly.

With these words, Sherlock sunk even further into comfort. He realised his hand was now stroking John's leg and he hoped that was okay. John hadn't asked him to stop. He didn't want to stop. "You continue to save me, I think," he mumbled. "It's good. I trust you."

"I love you, too" John said quietly. The words snuck out but they'd been on his mind for a while. He held his breath as he waited for the reaction.

And suddenly everything wrong or even possibly wrong was gone. Sherlock was without urgency and anxiety and uncertainty. He had absolutely everything in the world he needed right in this moment. "Yes, John," he responded. "When I realised I was missing you, I couldn't ignore the fact that it was because I . . . had similar feelings." He paused. "You can see now why I found it so . . . alarming. But I was right, you were able to provide me what I needed," he mumbled as he sort of kissed the thigh of John's jeans, simply because at that second it was what he felt like doing. "Thank you."

John was listening but all he heard was that Sherlock loved him too. He bent down awkwardly and pressed his lips onto Sherlock's temple.

For a moment Sherlock did nothing. Literally nothing. He wasn't evaluating, he wasn't planning, he wasn't even thinking. He just felt. Felt John's body shift as he leaned over, felt John's mouth on his skin. And for the first time in his entire life, doing nothing was the greatest feeling in the world.


End file.
